


Koschei's Prank

by theprydonian_archivist



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Character Study, Drug Use, Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-26
Updated: 2013-10-26
Packaged: 2018-07-15 01:19:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7199633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theprydonian_archivist/pseuds/theprydonian_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Koschei and Ushas feel like they should prank Theta. So they Do. Koschei earns the consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Koschei's Prank

**Author's Note:**

> Hai :D
> 
> Note from Versaphile, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Prydonian](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Prydonian). Deciding that it needed to have a more long-term home, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact the e-mail address on [The Prydonian collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/theprydonian/profile).

  
Author's note: Enjoy. You can rate and or comment Idc. ;3  


* * *

"Theta's very persistent. If we don't get away with this he'll never forgive me."

"Sh! You still have his lab combination, right?"  
~~~~~~  
Theta awoke to a bright new day. The birds were singing, the grass was covered in dew drops, he was ready to day dream. Sadly, it was an academy day. He sighed. 

Soon he was ready, blonde locks bouncing, robes flowing in the light breeze in the hall. He put on a smile for the day and pushed the door into the first class. 

His assignment was easy enough. Substitutes were always easy on everyone. All he had to Do was make grass green, like on Earth. But he needed a certain element to Do that, and right now, he didn't really feel like doing that. So he trudged up Perdition and sat under his favorite tree as the leaves swayed in the breeze. He fell into a shallow slumber as he watched the second sun fall from his view. 

He jolted awake. Shit. He'd fallen asleep again. His assignment was due tomorrow and the element he needed was extremely hard to find at night. But he sighed and scavenged the surroundings.

 It was 4 am, and Theta had just gotten all the ingredients to make the grass green. He punched the code in for his lab and hardly waited for the door to slide away, clipping his robes and resulting in a gaping hole on the side of his hip. Shit! He put the ingredients down and tugged at the fabric still suck In the doorway. He pushed the button and the door slid closed, releasing his robes. 

"Shit, shit. Fuck." Theta cursed rapidly. 

He wished that this assignment was easier. 

It may have been 6 am, but Theta had just put the finishing touches on his assignment. He'd also sown his robes back together. He mumbled under his breath and carried the experiment to the class, already thirty minutes late.   
~~~~~~~~  
"Theta doesn't look any different."

"You forgot to rig it, you idiot!"

"I'll try again after class."  
~~~~~~~~~  
Theta was exhausted and skipped his lab entirely. He headed straight for his dorm, stumbling over his feet. He punched in the code, failing a couple times, then fell into his bed, not bothering to acknowledge his very worried dorm mate. 

"Theta?"

"Piss off." 

Theta buried his face in his pillow. 

"Theta. Listen-"

Theta groaned and threw a pillow at Koschei. 

"Oi! What the hell?!"

"Piss off!"  
~~~~~~~~  
Theta finally stepped into his lab to begin the next assignment.

When suddenly...  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
A blast of cold powder spurted into his face. Theta coughed and sputtered. 

"What the..*cough* shit?!"

He Wiped his face and opened his eyes. His pupils grew massively as the drugs began to work.   
~~~~~~~~~  
"Koschei?! KOSCHEY WOSHY?! I need my Koschey!!"

Theta stumbled through the corridors shouting at the top of his lungs. 

"Let's PARTY! I'll bring the wine! No scratch that. I'll bring the BEER!!! Koschei?! Get the fuck out here! We're sneaking out of academy tonight! WOO!"

Theta banged on his dorm. A sleepy Koschei answered. 

"Koschei! Let's get the fuck out of here. It's too bright! I'm sure it'll be darker outside! C'mon!"

Theta grabbed at Koschei's hand, failing miserably. 

"How the fuck?! When did you get so many HANDS?!"

"Sh!"

Koschei clamped his hand over Theta's mouth and pulled him into their dorm. He closed the door behind him. 

"Shit. It really worked."

"What?!"

"Sh!"

Koschei held his face in his hands. 

"Is my poor little Koschey Woshy crying? Don't worry. I'll bring the beer!"

"Shut it Theta."

"Grumpy puss!!!"

"I said shut up!"

Koschei pushed Theta onto the bed. 

"Oo in the mood are we?~"

"No. I mean. Well. Just shut it for a minute!"

For a few seconds, everything was silent until Theta started humming loudly. Koschei sighed. Soon the humming became singing and the singing erratic dancing and screaming. 

"Theta!"

Koschei grabbed Theta by the waist and hoisted him up into the air. 

"Shut it!"

"Whatr' you going to Do about it? Hmm?~"

Koschei put Theta down and sighed. 

"I want a snog! A long hard meaningful night of sex with my best bud! Right now! C'mon Kosch I'll help you get undressed."

"Theta. I'm sorry."

"Wha-"

"Ushas and I put the....drugs...in your lab and rigged it to fly in your face. I didn't want it to be like this. It was an experiment."

Theta stared at him menacingly. Koschei gulped. Theta stayed silent until he sat up, grabbed Koschei's robes, pulled him close, and whispered," Well then, better snog before I'm sober, eh?"

Theta wrapped his arms around Koschei and pulled him into a deep, french kiss. By the Time Theta pulled back, Koschei was gasping and whimpering. 

"Theta please."

"To hell with The please. Beg me, Koschei."

Theta pushed Koschei back onto the bed.  He placed his leg between Kosch's thighs and pushed them apart. 

"Please Theta. Fuck....ung~"

Theta placed his hands on either side of Koschei and mouthed at his neck. Koschei tensed. 

"Oh my darling, so desperate to get a good fuck. But tonight, I'm topping."

Theta places his hands on Koschei's chest and pulled him into another enthralling kiss. Koschei sunk back into the bed. 

"What my dear, can't handle being topped? Oo so cute~"

"N-no-Theta. Fuck me~"

"My pleasure."  
~~~~~~~~~~  
End :D

* * *

Thanks for the read. Or skipping to the end blah blah blah you know the rest. No next button.


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